He counts every one … 

Yesterday … Or was it Thursday … Yeah Thursday I went to therapy with Danny. Usually he comes with me it’s not our marriage coaching it’s specifically for me but I like him to be there with me, supporting me and helping me to remember things she says later when I’m struggling. So far I think he has only had to miss 2 due to usually a baseball game. Anyways, we were talking about how I just feel like I have tears behind my eyes all the time. Ask me how I am and yeah I might look ok or feel ok but could literally cry at any second related to anything or nothing at all. I felt like before I would cry and get it out and I could move on and feel better, but now I just feel like the tears are constantly there without an end and usually without an identifiable reason. 

She reminded me that tears are good. Tears are a part of growing, learning, grieving, praising… And so much more. They may just be tears I’ve had bottle up side for a long time and am finally letting them come to the surface. But if I don’t know why I’m crying that’s ok too, thankfully Danny agreed, because let’s face it if I am a river of tears and Danny isn’t ok with riding that out or doesn’t understand then it could cause quite a bit of strain on us. This is just the path I’m on right now, tears for no specific reason and being ok with that … Allowing myself to feel that is ok. And as Danny and I got in the car I heard the Lords gentle whisper … Bottle tears … God counts our tears. I frantically searched my brain for where I read or heard this … Asked Danny if he remembers me reading it to him or remembered us listening to something on the radio about it but nothing came to mind. But Gods whisper didn’t let up … 

After picking up the kids from school and getting home Danny went back to work and I continued to hear the whisper … I count your every tear none of them are a waste. Then I remembered  psalm 56:8 … 

 

I had recently underlined psalm 56:8 while reading the circle maker … I grabbed my kindle and searched for the text …  

 

Each an every teardrop is precious to God he says … Whatever the reason the teardrop is for.  “The day will come when he will wipe away every tear in heaven” 

 

The rest of it is mainly in only that top paragraph on the second picture. But not to be lost on the reading … He honors every tear … He collects every tear and will remember each one because though sometimes we may feel like saying … Well I don’t know why I’m crying it’s stupid I guess … It’s totally not to the Lord. He doesn’t care if your crying for a reason that you can identify or your crying because your just sad and you don’t know why. Those tears are a part of you and He accounts for them, He honors them, He longs to wipe those tears that you feel are stupid from your face because stupid tears or not He hears, sees and sheds tears with you! 

Last night I shed a lot of tears. Danny left this morning for an overnight baseball trip … I knew I would miss him bad, he has been by my side since everything happened in all the good and bad times so incredibly devoted to me. He has been self-less and just my rock. My solid solid rock. What if I cried for no reason and he wasn’t here to hold me or listen or just be my rock to lean on? Then another whisper … My God counts all my tears, honors all my tears, remembers all my tears, not a single one is lost on God. So that means even those tears we shed at those lovey dovey sappy girly movies He is collecting so when we meet our one true father He can wipe every single one of them away. Praying today that even if I shed tears today Or tomorrow or everyday to come, that I/we will be reminded that the Lord counts every single tear waiting on us to come to heaven so he can wipe them all away for good! 

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